


Four Times Kara Stays Silent, and One Time She Doesn't

by Phoenix2312



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-20
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2019-03-21 18:10:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13746477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenix2312/pseuds/Phoenix2312
Summary: The entire time she's been on Earth, Kara has watched as Alex is hurt by her parents, she watches and listens, but she never says anything she doesn't know what to say. Instead Kara loves Alex. Tries to love her enough to make up for all of the times she's stayed silent until one day she can't be silent anymore.





	Four Times Kara Stays Silent, and One Time She Doesn't

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again! I got such a great response to my first 4+1 Kalex story I decided to post this one too. 
> 
> I've never liked the Danvers parents, especially Eliza. I'm happy they redeemed her character some when she positively responded to Alex's coming out, but overall I just feel like she's always treated the girls unfairly. So this is my take on that. In there Eliza gets no redemption. But Kara does get the girl. 
> 
> This is Kalex, if you don't like, don't read. Otherwise, Enjoy!

1.

Kara is thirteen now. She’s only been on earth for a few months, and is still mourning her parents and Krypton. Every day she struggles to adapt to this new planet and her new life as part of the Danvers family.

She likes them for the most part. Eliza and Jeremiah are kind to her, they do their very best to make sure she feels welcome. They dote on her, give her anything and everything she asks for.

They fawn over her every ability, super or otherwise. Eliza claps delightedly when Kara sings, Jeremiah coos over her when she speaks in her native Kryptonian tongue. Eliza takes her shopping and fixes her hair in pretty styles. Jeremiah helps her control her powers with a gentle guiding hand. They treat her like a princess, as though she’s the center of their entire universe.

And she enjoys the attention, it takes her mind off of the horrors in her past, if only for a while.

But for all the doting Kara receives, Alex becomes worse than invisible.  She becomes a target.

Because for every praise Kara receives Alex, who’s easily her favorite of the Danvers, receives a punishment. It would be better if they simply ignored their biological daughter. That isn’t the case.

Kara notices, but she doesn’t really understand.

She’s still new and learning about earth customs, so it takes her months to see it. Then one day, she does.

But even after she notices how Eliza and Jeremiah treat Alex, Kara assumes it’s normal for earth parents to be critical of their biological children. She isn’t really a Danvers, she’s an alien. In her mind that explains the difference.

They’re careful never to criticize Alex in front of her. That doesn’t mean she can’t hear them.

She doesn’t say anything.

Doesn’t say anything the day she accidentally shoves a boy too hard, knocking him to the ground after he’d pulled her hair. (He’d gotten up moving to hit Kara, but Alex intervened. She’d broken the boys’ nose)

Despite the fact that Alex had tried explaining she was only following her mother’s orders to ‘protect her sister’, she’s punished severely.

(She's not allowed to watch TV, use her computer or hang out with her friends. And there's a red handprint across her check for several days afterwards)

She doesn't say anything the day Alex received a less that perfect test grade because she’d spend the night soothing Kara’s nightmares instead of studying.

(Her punishment for failing the test was not being allowed to play in her teams’ soccer tournament. Alex was devastated.)

Not even, when Alex and Kara were playing in the water and Kara had mistakenly swum halfway across ocean, does Kara say anything.

(That time Alex had been grounded for several weeks, and was not allowed to do anything aside from walking back and forth to school with Kara. There'd been finger shaped bruises on her biceps too)

Each time Eliza and Jeremiah tear into Alex, Kara, hidden from view, watches the girl’s eyes fall to the floor as she trie to hold back the tears. She watches the older girl hold herself together until she’s alone. Sometimes Kara silently cries as she listens to the way Alex is treated.

Alex who is sweet and kind and gentle. Who tucks Kara hair behind her ear, and holds her hand when she’s scared.

Kara quietly floats into Alex’s room at night and holds the other girl until the tears subside.

She still stays silent though...

 

2.

Kara is 15 now. She’s been on earth long enough to realize that most earth parents do not treat their children the way that Eliza and Jeremiah treat Alex.

Parents on earth are not that different from one’s on Krypton.

They love their children endlessly and only want the best for them.

Of course, at times reprimands and punishments are essential, but most of the time, parents are meant to give encouragement and support. To be proud of their children.

But not for the Danvers family. They are different; because while there is always an endless supply of love, understanding and acceptance for their adopted Kryptonian daughter, there is nothing but disdain for their biological daughter.

Kara observes it every day.

Hears the way Eliza constantly chastises Alex. Her grades aren’t good enough, her appearance is unacceptable, her guitar playing is subpar, she isn’t spending enough hours practicing her soccer drills. She’s lazy, she’s unmotivated, she’s not trying hard enough, she’s doesn’t protect Kara good enough. The list is endless.

Alex is _never_ enough for them. Alex is _always_ enough for Kara.

Above all else, Alex is berated for anything that involves Kara.

When Kara had gotten upset at school and broken her locker it was Alex’s fault. When a teacher saw Darren kiss her (against her will) under the bleachers, it was Alex’s fault. The time that they’d gotten caught after Kara convinced Alex to go flying with her, was Alex’s fault.

No matter what happens, even when Kara tries to protest, she’s always let off because in Eliza’s words “she is still learning”. But Alex is “supposed to know better,” so she bears the punishments alone.

Alex never complains.

Kara hates it. But she doesn’t know how to fix it. So she does the only thing she can think of, she tries to love Alex enough for her parents disapproval not to matter.

Alex is perfect in Kara’s eyes.

With the passing years Alex stops crying, stops showing any emotion at all really. Instead she keeps her chin up and stares past Eliza with a stoic expression on her face, her answer always the same.

“Yes ma’am I will be better next time.”

She hardens her heart, brick by brick building an impenetrable fortress that no one can penetrate, no one except for Kara.

Even though Alex doesn’t cry anymore Kara still slips into her room each night and they spend hours talking about everything and nothing cuddled together. Alex smiles at Kara so tenderly that it makes her heart ache.

Before they fall asleep, Kara always whispers those three precious words as she kisses the girl’s forehead. Alex says them back every time.  

There are many times Kara wonders if Alex will start to resent her. Harden her heart towards Kara too…because it's her fault, she knows it is.

But it never happens. Alex never blames Kara for the differences in the way they are treated, Kara can’t help blaming herself.

But she still stays silent.

 

3.

She’s 17 now. Alex is 18, and a senior this year.

There’s been a lot of tension and fighting about colleges and futures around the house.  

Alex wants to go to National City University to study criminal justice. Her parents aren’t happy with this. They want her to be a doctor or a scientist. They insist she goes to an Ivy League School half-way across the country.

She doesn’t want to go. Kara doesn’t want her to go either.

Another sore spot is the fact that Alex, tired of their parent’s oppressive expectations is starting to rebel. Cutting her long hair short and adding pink streaks, she even gets a tattoo. She cuts class, quits her soccer team and smashes her guitar to pieces.

(Kara knows those last two things are a direct result of the constant harassment Alex receives about not being good enough at either. For Christmas Kara buys her a new guitar with her allowance money because she loves hearing Alex play. Alex will only play when they’re alone, but she doesn’t mind.)

Phrases like “wasting your potential”, “we’re disappointed”, “we expect better” and “it’s not enough” frequently echo through the house.

Kara’s heart aches for Alex with each one.

For months, every night ends in the same arguments between mother and daughter as Jeremiah tries to intervene and Kara sits at the top of the stairs, silent and unseen. Tears in her eyes.

All hell breaks loose in the house when Alex (and Kara) stay out all night at a friend’s party. They don’t do anything bad or really even out of the ordinary for teenagers. Alex has two beers and they hang out around a bonfire with some of the kids from school.

When they sneak back in at dawn, Eliza is waiting for them. She simply tells Kara to call next time and lets her go to her room.

But Eliza’s anger towards Alex is terrible.

That night is the first time in years that Alex cries. She cries hard into Kara’s chest as the Kryptonian girl gently brushes back pink-streaked hair, placing tender kisses on the girl’s forehead.

When the sobs stop, Kara thinks Alex has fallen asleep. But her super hearing picks up the broken whisper that falls from Alex’s lips.

_Why am I never good enough?_

Protectiveness and white-hot rage surge through Kara’s body.

Eliza is Alex’s mother, she is supposed to protect the girl from getting hurt, not be the cause of it.

In that moment Kara vows to spend the rest of eternity making sure Alex knows how special she is. She will do whatever it takes.

If Eliza won’t love Alex the way she deserves, Kara will love her twice, three times, as much. Kara will love her enough that Eliza’s actions won’t matter.

She pulls Alex closer, tightening her hold, but she still stays silent.

 

4.

She’s 23 now. A senior at National City University.

Alex going to college had been rough on both of them, but they’d managed to stay close. Keeping in contact through messages, phone calls and video chat sessions.

When it was time for Kara to apply for college she’d refused to apply anywhere except the University Alex was attending. Being just one year apart, they’d been allowed to share an apartment on campus for her first two years.

But then Alex, deciding to take her career in a different direction had needed to change universities. That was a few months ago. They’ve drifted apart some since them.

Kara hates it, it makes her heart ache with a loneliness she hasn’t felt since the Phantom Zone.

But she also loves Alex enough to let the girl have some space, have her own life without constantly taking care of Kara.

They still talk sometimes, and on a few occasions, she’s flown across the country to see the girl.

Alex seems happy.

It’s all Kara had ever wanted.

She knows that getting away from Eliza and Jeremiah had been important for the girl. But she wonders if being away from her is helping too. That thought hurts. But every time Alex sees Kara she holds her tightly.

Even now that they aren’t as close, Kara makes a point to remind Alex that she is loved. Every single day.

Things are good.

Until Jeremiah is killed, then Alex starts to spiral.

Kara knows things are bad. Knows Alex is falling to pieces. That she’s throwing away her life, drowning in alcohol. What she doesn’t know is how to fix it, so she does what she’s always done. She loves Alex. Loves her as hard and as fiercely as she possibly can.

Kara’s halfway across the country, still trying to finish her degree and cope with Jeremiah’s death. But she does her best to make sure Alex doesn’t completely wreck her life. Does her best to keep Alex away from Eliza, who’s also found solace at the bottom of a bottle (She’s worse than ever before). Kara tries to shield Alex from it the best she can.

It never works.

Countless times she flies across the country to take care of Alex after she gets into a fight or loses herself in a line of cocaine. In her drunk or drug induced state Alex tells Kara about all of the awful things Eliza has ever said and done to her (still says to her sometimes).  

It makes Kara sick. 

She has no idea what to do, so she stays silent. She shoulders all of the burdens. She doesn’t complain, she just silently vows to take care of Alex the best she can. To keep her promise and love the girl with everything she has.

It takes a while, and some unknown help, but Alex gets better, despite Kara's silence.

 

5.

She 26 now, working as Cat Grant’s assistant at CatCo. She’s also daylighting as Supergirl.

Kara never intended to become a superhero like Kal-El, but when she sees Alex’s plane dropping from the sky, the choice is made for her.

Kara will do anything to protect Alex.

So she outs herself.

It’s not so bad.

It had been time to stop hiding in the shadows anyways.

Alex is angry at first. She’s worried and afraid, but eventually she accepts the idea.

It isn’t long after that when Kara finds out the true nature of Alex’s job.

She not only works for a secret government agency but does it to protect Kara.

Kara’s heart feels like it might explode when she finds out Alex loves her that much.

Over the past few months they’ve gotten closer again. But now it’s something more, something neither acknowledges, they dance around it. The edges of their relationship tinged with things unsaid.

Alex holds her a little bit tighter, Kara’s kisses on soft cheeks linger, Alex stays over for long periods of time. Eventually she stops going back to her apartment at all. They always share a bed.

They work as a flawless unit during missions for the DEO. There are a several bumps along the way and few near death misses. But in the end, it only makes them stronger. Just like her family motto.

_Strong together._

They always have been.

Kara loves Alex. Loves her more than she should. Kara isn’t really sure when it happened because her entire life on earth has been about loving Alex.

She doesn’t mind.

They’re supposed to be “sisters”, but to Kara, they’ve always been more. They’re best friends, partners, in all the ways that matter they’re bond-mates. Kara has never really thought of Alex as her sister. She’s always been more.... She feels like home.

But she stays silent, because she doesn’t want to mess things up or ruin what they have.  

She tries her best to move on, to date other people. It never works. No one can compare. Instead she focuses on making sure Alex is happy and healthy and that she feels loved.

Kara is good at that.

She spends her time doing what she can to protect Alex.

She’d do anything. She’d lie, steal, cheat, she’d even kill.

She’d burn the entire world down, the entire universe if she had too.

Alex is her everything.

To other people Kara is sweetness and sunshine. But when it comes to Alex she is like the blazing sun.

Sometimes Kara forgets to take care of herself. Throwing herself into danger without a second thought always to protect the older woman. Alex always chastises her, before pulling her in close and refusing to let her go.

Alex is still stoic, and often a bit detached, but her stone heart melts, always, for Kara.

Alex plasters her face with kisses and cuddles closer to her at night. She lets Kara hold her, let’s her wipe away (rare) tears.

They fall into a routine. Alex doesn’t date, and Kara doesn’t either. It’s just the two of them.

They dance around each other, sometimes Kara wonders if she should be honest with Alex, especially when the older girl says those three magic words.

Kara always says them back. They mean something different to her.

But she doesn’t mind, so long as Alex is happy.

When the news of Eliza’s impending arrival reaches her. Kara is frazzled.

She and Alex have made a life for themselves in National City. It’s messy and chaotic at times, full of aliens and monsters and danger.

But it’s also full of love, joy and laughter. They binge watch Netflix shows and eat buckets of ice cream. They have game nights and karaoke battles with their friends. They spend hours with J’onn who has become a father figure for both of them. They bicker and argue, they drive each other crazy. They share quiet, intimate moments that make Kara’s heart race. Alex’s walls come down bit by bit not just for Kara, but for all the people she now considers family. For J'onn and Winn, Jame and Lucy and Vasquez.

They build each other up, Alex grounds Kara, and Kara helps Alex soar.   

It’s a good life.

When she and Alex discuss Eliza’s arrival Kara tries to act nonchalant. She tries to ease Alex’s (very real) insecurities. Alex tries to hide her tears, and the panic attacks.

But Kara sees.

She flies laps around the city as Alex sleeps trying to work out a plan.

She won’t let Eliza come into their lives and ruin what they’re worked so hard to build. She has to do something.

Eliza has always treated them differently, but she’s always done it in a way that without insider knowledge, it’s almost undetectable.

Someone looking from the outside would simply see a mother trying her to do her best by her children. Both of them.

Kara knows that isn’t the case.

Alex has never been treated fairly. And she refuses to let it happen anymore.

The day Eliza is set to arrive, Alex’s stoic persona rears its head. She does her best to downplay the whole thing. She tells Kara that it doesn’t matter, that she’s over it. That her mother’s opinions don’t bother her, that she’s accepted long ago that she’ll never be enough for the older woman.

Of course Kara knows better.

Alex has never wanted Kara to feel like it’s her fault. (Kara does).

Eliza shows up full of pleasantries. Kara hugs her foster mom, trying her best to remain calm.

Everything seems to go well at first. Until she finds Alex crying a few days later.

Kara doesn’t ask questions, she doesn’t have too. She isn’t sure what Eliza has said but knows it must’ve been bad, Alex rarely cries. Kara’s blood boils because when will that women realize what she’s doing to Alex?

Alex tries to distance herself for Kara. Kara won't let her pull away. Instead she holds the brunette close and tries to ignore the stabbing pain in her heart when she hears the mumbled words.

_I will never be enough._

Thanksgiving is the next day and tensions are high. She had hoped that inviting Winn would make Eliza behave. It doesn’t work.

Winn decides to leave. Kara walks him to the door, apologizing for her foster mother’s behavior, he just shrugs. They say their goodbyes and she turns to head back into the kitchen.

She can hear Eliza and Alex arguing the entire time she’s gone, but she doesn’t use her superhearing, and instead moves towards the doorway.

They’re standing on opposite sides of the kitchen, Alex has her back against the far counter, arms tightly crossed over her stomach holding herself together. Her eyes are downcast, lip drawn between her teeth hard enough to draw blood.

She looks the same way she did at 14, completely defeated as Eliza berates her.

Kara only catches bits of what’s being said “how could you”, “why didn’t you stop her”, “your supposed to protect her”, “such a disappointment”, “it’s not enough”.

Something inside of Kara snaps, she steps into the kitchen.

She’s spent the last 13 years being silent. She won’t do it anymore.

“Eliza! That’s enough.” Her voice comes out deep and authoritative. Very unlike herself.

Two pairs of eyes dart over to her. One full of shock, the other, uncertainty.

“Kara hunny I didn’t see you there.” Eliza lightens her voice and tries for a smile.

“Alex and I were just having a discussion. Perhaps you could go clean up while we…” Kara cuts her off.

“Don’t bother.” The older woman looks truly astonished at Kara’s harsh tone.

“You don’t get to come into _our home_ and treat Alex like that. I appreciate all you’ve done for me over the years, but I won’t let you talk to her that way anymore.”

Shock is clearly visible on her foster mom’s face, Kara can only imagine the visible fire burning in her own eyes.

“Kara, sweetheart, I’m not sure what you think you…” Kara cuts her off again.

“You think I don’t know what was just going on? Have you forgotten I have superhearing?”

“Well no dear, we were just having a little disagreement, that’s all. Nothing to worry about.”

Kara breaks eye contact with Eliza to look over at Alex who’s still standing arms around herself.

“Don’t lie to me… please. You don’t think that I see how you treat her? How you’ve always treated her? You think that I didn’t hear you criticizing her and punishing her when we were kids, even when it was my fault? Do you think I couldn’t hear the things you said to her when you thought I wasn't there? I’ve stayed silent for too long and I won’t anymore.” She moves a little farther into the room, placing herself directly between the two women, trying all the while to keep her voice calm as rage swirls inside of her.

“Kara.” Eliza takes a step closer.

“You were new to the planet, you didn’t know better, Alex did. I was only ever trying to protect you and push you both to do your very best. Yes, I was hard on her, but I only did it because I care.”

It takes all of her will-power not to roll her eyes.

“If you really wanted what was best for her you would have supported her like you supported me. You would have taken care of her, encouraged her, protected her, like you did for me. Instead you focused all of your energy on scolding her for every little thing.”

Eliza reaches out to touch Kara’s shoulder trying to rebuke the accusations. Kara shakes off the touch.

“I care for you Eliza, and I always will, but she…” Kara points over at Alex.

“She is my everything. I’m not an insecure child anymore, and I won’t stand by while you hurt her.”

“I love you too sweetie, but I promise I never…”

“No more lies. I don’t want to hear it. For years your words have destroyed her. Can’t you see that?! Alex is smart, talented, beautiful and so incredibly kind. She is the bravest, most selfless woman I know. She is extraordinary in every way. She has spent her life trying to please you, feeling like she isn’t good enough. When she is MORE than enough. She is everything. So, no more.”

This whole time Alex has stood motionless in the corner, tears falling down her face. Kara can see her out of the corner of her eye, attention completely on Kara, love for the woman swells inside of her chest. It mixes with rage for Eliza and the adrenaline of finally speaking out.

It’s a dangerous combination that clouds her judgement. Her next sentence comes out without her volition.

“You aren’t welcome in this house again until you can own up to and apologize for everything you’ve put her through… I won’t let you hurt the woman I love anymore…”

Silence falls in the room as Kara realizes what she’s just said. Eliza’s face is full of shock and fury, but Kara misses it completely. Because she only has eyes for Alex.

Blue eyes find hazel ones. No longer downcast Alex stares into her face, almost hungrily, searching. The scrutiny nearly makes her look away or mumble out an apology, but something in Alex’s expression freezes her in place.

Eliza slips from the apartment without either girl noticing.

They’re alone.

Alex stands up straighter, arms dropping from her middle as she strides purposefully over to Kara.

They’re only inches apartment. Kara is terrified, but she’s also full of a nervous excitement.

It’s Alex who breaks the silence.

“You knew?”

Its not the first thing Kara expects to hear Alex say. But she nods.

“All this time you let me think that you were completely oblivious to the way she treated me. Why?”

“I didn’t know what to say Alex. At first I was oblivious, but as we got older I started to see how she treated you, to really see it. I hated her for it. I wanted to say something. But I was scared I'd make it worse. Instead I promised myself that If Eliza wasn’t going to, that I’d spend forever making sure you knew how amazing you are… But I’m sorry I didn’t stand up to her sooner…”

There are tears on Alex’s cheeks.

Kara wipes them away.

“Thank you. For taking care of me. For always making sure I felt loved. And thank you for standing up for me now… I know that wasn’t easy.”

Kara smiles at her.

“I would do it again in a heartbeat. I will not let anyone hurt you Alex, I will keep you safe, even if it’s from Eliza. You are my everything.”

Feeling a little shy the brunette drops her gaze for a moment. Taking that as a bad sign Kara starts to pull back.

“Wait!” Alex’s voice is too loud in the small kitchen, but Kara stops moving away.

There is a long pause between them before the older woman speaks.

“Did you mean it? What you said to mom I mean?” Her voice, which was so loud a second ago, is now only a whisper.

“Every word.”

Alex sucks in a breath, but she doesn’t pull away. Just stares at Kara with wide, hopeful eyes.

Kara takes a deep breath. She'll be silent no more.

“I’m in love with you Alex.”

She barely gets the words out before Alex is kissing her.

It’s everything she never thought she’d be allowed to have.

Alex’s hands tangle in her hair, Kara grips at a slender waist pulling her even closer.

When the brunette swipes a tongue along Kara’s bottom lip, asking for entrance, her heart nearly flies from her chest.

The kiss is slow, deep and passionate. It’s filled with emotion, conveying all of the feeling between them.

So lost in the kiss, Kara doesn’t notice that they’re suddenly hovering several feet off of the ground.

Eventually they’re forced to part, both needing air. Alex lets out a tiny squeak when she realizes they aren’t on the ground anymore.

Kara looks a little sheepish but pulls the older girl tighter into her body, making sure she doesn’t fall.

They stare into each other’s eyes for a long time before Alex leans in and places a soft kiss on pink lips.

“I love you too.”

Just as the last word leaves Alex’s mouth Kara is sweeping her up bridal style and flying out of the open kitchen window into the night sky, unable to control her own excitement.

Alex wraps her arms around Kara’s neck and lets out a joyous laugh.

As they fly through the night sky, Kara doesn’t think she’ll ever be silent again.

 

 

 


End file.
